Christian Rebuking Versus Loving, Listening, and Sharing / Facebook and Attitude

I read a post by someone on Facebook, a person who used to be just another regular sinner saved by Grace, who now has appointed himself the some kind of self-styled "on fire for The Lord" expert on throwing out bits of scripture.

He used to be a cool "real" guy, but now he seems to be a semi-plastic parody of the whole conservative evangelical error that their theology, as quoted in the parts of the Bible that most appeal to them, is somehow more "true" than other legimate less-right wing exegesis and interpretation.

He quoted a verse on how a rebuke to the wise is a beautiful thing. True enough. But I find the quoting of scripture from certain people can be rather annoying. Everybody want to be the teacher, nobody want to be the student. Oh, they will deny that, but they just can't see their kind of insider church jargon as a way to appear "deep," or like they really "get it."

I replied with a thought that to love and forgive is more a Jesus-style approach that slapping out rebukes. Others got defensive (can you even carry on a polite conversation with a right wing conservative evangelical young Christian without them getting defensive?), and basically claimed the rebukes in their life changed them, perhaps more than the love and forgiveness of Jesus!

"He who is forgiven little loves little, but he who is forgiven much loves much." I always get to feeling like an outsider among the ones who won't or can't discuss things like this without getting uptight.

I hate to say it, but I'm tired of that kind of church culture and associated stereotypical jargon, slogans, worship, and attitudes.

Is it not permissible to be an independent intelligent Christian, interpreting the Bible for yourself as you study and talk to God about it? Do only the ones who go to the "right" church" with the "right" theology who speak the "right" phrases and agree with each other make the cut with God?

I can't go back to the person I was who put up with a dysfunctional church and church culture who was slapped down every time I asked a hard or probing question. I had high hopes of finding someone with enough intelligence, knowledge, and love to accept my inquisitive, analytical, and questioning thoughts and concerns for over 10 years of trying.

I'm not sure many of those people exist. If they do, it's probably no safer for them to speak their mind than it was for me.

I thank God for Philip Yancey, Dr. Hugh Ross, and many others who have validated my genuine concerns and have addressed them as no one did or does at the churches I have been a part of. Thank George Barnha for writing "The Revolution," so I didn't feel like a spiritual loser because church never really met my needs, or those of hundreds of thousands of others like my wife and me, who choose to not go to church now for no reason other than tradition, guilt, or some misapplied Bible verses.

Speaking of my controversial friend Dr. Barnha:

Barna is known for providing extensive surveys regarding Christianity and the state of the church. Among his findings that have generated substantial interest or controversy in recent years include:

• children are the most important population segment to minister to because of their spiritual vulnerability;
• Protestant churches are generally ineffective vessels for evangelism and discipleship
• most Protestant pastors are neither called to nor competent in leadership or as counselors;
• less than one out of every ten born again adults possess a Biblical world view;
• every church engages in marketing, but few do it well^;
• mass media has the most dramatic effect on people's behavior and beliefs;
• alternative forms of church life — including house churches — are growing rapidly;
• a growing group of spiritually devout Christians, known as Revolutionaries, are embracing a post-congregational narrative that is reshaping spiritual life in the U.S.;
• most "church growth" is simply the recycling of church-goers from one congregation to another.
• divorce rate amongst born-again Christians is significantly higher than that for atheist/agnostics. A more recent 2008 Barna report shows a closer divorce rate gap between born-again Christians (32% had been divorced) and atheist/agnostics (30% had been divorced).

I thank the friends I've made who are able to deal with the hard cold reality of what church really is and what it really does to people, versus the beautiful, fulfilling, and spiritually liberating freedom of salvation in Jesus. That is where my heart and my head lie, and no one but Jesus has a right to manipulate me to their less-than-spiritual ends.